11.1 -Faith, Focus, and the Wisdom of Saying No
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Revisiting the Place of Vision
We're almost ready to jump to chapter 11 of John's chronicle of his time with Jesus, but as Maya Angelou said, "You can't really know where you're going until you know where you've been.”
In the recent past, in John, chapter 10, Jesus met with some acceptance, but rejection has rushed him like a couple of blitzing linebackers. He was called "demon-possessed" and accused of blasphemy. He was almost arrested, almost stoned, and by enemies, but those he so desperately wanted to understand his relationship with God. And let's not misunderstand him. He was not looking for people to agree with him. He was not looking for a pat on the back or to be elected the new high priest.
His deepest desire was that they experience this relationship themselves - to know God as the father within, not some angry wizard behind the curtain. He wanted them to "know the truth" and allow it to unlock the cell door of their rigorous religion.
So, why didn't they? Why the minor acceptance and the major rejection? Like the jailer with two kids in college, the rejectors have a vested interest in the status quo. They did not want him “messing up the good thing they had going on” or life as they had always known it. They were in a privileged position, and the system, however flawed, worked well for them. They are not so different from me. I remember times when I resisted change because my life was going well. But that's another story, and we’re concerned with rejection and how Jesus responded to it.
Why Jesus Returned Across the Jordan
At the end of 10, John tells us that Jesus "went away again across the Jordan to the place where John had been baptizing earlier, and he remained there.” “Why?"I wondered. When I peeked over the fence in chapter 11 and saw that he refused to leave this place even when summoned by his best friends, my cat-killing curiosity kicked in and caused the hair on the back of my neck to stand up. "What was so special about this place across the Jordan?”
For days, I deliberated with myself. "What was so special about this place?”I followed the bouncing dot from my spirit’s laser pointer down the dark hallway of my imagination until I found a door with light seeping under it. I opened it, and the answer almost blinded me. Jesus had returned to the place of his vision, the launchpad of his mission, and that sacred place where he had heard those confirming words of John:
Behold the lamb of god, who takes away the sins of the world,
a man of higher rank than me,
the one who baptizes in the Holy Spirit, and
this is the son of God
The Importance of Revisiting Foundational Moments
Not only that, but it was in this place that Jesus first heard those soul-quenching words, "You are my son, in whom I am well pleased.” So, what was Jesus’ antidote to an overdose of rejection? He revisited the place of his vision and, no doubt, reviewed his mission. He lingered there and would not leave until his batteries were recharged and his system rebooted. Did he need to hear those life-affirming words again, or was it enough to revisit the place?
Personal Reflection: Aligning Actions with Core Values
To my grandchildren and their children: This is an important yet often overlooked lesson. When things in the present do not add up to the vision of our future, when 2+2 no longer seems to equal four, it helps to remove ourselves from the confusion and revisit the place of our original vision and commitment to it. We ask ourselves, “Do my short-term goals and daily actions align with my vision? Can we adapt to environmental changes while focusing on our core purpose and values?” These simple actions and fundamental questions will help us “stay on track.” It reminds me of what Bill Thomas said about marriage: “When things get rocky, the best thing you can do is stand in front of your framed marriage certificate, hold hands, and remind each other that you once loved each other so much that you made a decision and a commitment to be married.”
Refocusing on Mission in the Face of Doubt
In between the lines and chapters, Jesus again shows us not what to believe but how to believe—how to restore faith in our vision. Return to that special spot where you first began to understand who you are, what values define you, and what you are willing to struggle for. Linger there and return often until the vision becomes clear once again. Reboot. Recharge.
“Values are about prioritization. Everybody would love a good cannoli or a house in the Bahamas. The question is your priorities. What are the values that you prioritize above everything else and, therefore, influence your decision-making more than anything else? ”
John 11 as Parable and Truth
Chapter 11 begins with the raising of Lazarus. Anyone within three feet of a Bible knows the story, and that trips my alarm. Familiarity is not your friend when reconstructing a new and more practical faith. It can cause you to immediately jump to a common understanding and miss something important - something new that can only be seen through the lens of rumination and from a different angle. Remember, it was only when Galileo looked at the sun using a newly developed telescope that he saw sunspots, revealing the sun's rotation. Only after viewing the horizon from the deck of a ship did sailors discover the curvature of the Earth.
Only when men began to see Earth's "blue marble" image from space did we start to understand how fragile our environment is. Different angles or fresh perspectives can change things.
Is the Story of Lazarus a Parable?
The story goes that Lazarus gets sick, and the sisters summon Jesus. Jesus delays his arrival; Lazarus dies. Then, Jesus comes, weeps, and raises him from the dead. As far as we know, Lazarus lives happily ever after. "As far as we know" is what cued my curiosity. Think about it. The story is only told by John, and we never hear anything else about Lazarus. He didn't become a disciple; he wasn’t at Jesus's trial or crucifixion. He doesn't show up with the other followers in the Book of Acts. "Happily ever after" is about the best we can do. Let's review the story slowly, allowing it to simmer, and see if a new image appears.
New Perspectives: Reading Familiar Stories with Fresh Eyes
11:1 Now a certain man was ill, Lazarus of Bethany, the village of Mary and her sister Martha. 2 Mary was the one who anointed the Lord with perfume and wiped his feet with her hair; her brother Lazarus was ill. 3 So the sisters sent a message to Jesus, “Lord, he whom you love is ill.” 4 But when Jesus heard it, he said, “This illness does not lead to death; rather, it is for God’s glory, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it.” 5 Accordingly, though Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus, 6 after having heard that Lazarus was ill, he stayed two days longer in the place where he was.Unpacking the “Certain Man”: Themes of Essential Truths
Right off the bat, I'm faced with another puzzle. Why did John say, “Now, a certain man was ill?” Like Chekov’s gun, what was “a certain man” doing there? John could have said that Mary and Martha's brother, Lazarus, was ill. There's no need for "a certain man.” Furthermore, other stories that start with this idea of "a certain man” are all parables. In the Good Samaritan, “A certain man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho.” In the fig tree story, "A certain man had a fig tree." In the great banquet parable, “A certain man was giving a big dinner.” In the prodigal son story, “A certain man had two sons.” So maybe, just maybe, instead of a fact-based account that has us arguing over "how did he do that?” this story is meant to be read like a parable that illuminates essential truths.
Take a deep breath and look at this from a different angle. Once upon a time, there was a certain man—let's call him Lazarus—who was the brother of Mary and Martha. You get the picture.
Delayed Action and Divine Timing
Why Jesus Stayed Two More Days
Jesus did not come right away but stayed two more days in the place where he was. We have already discussed the value of returning to the place of your original vision and remaining there until your mission and purpose are clear once again. This was Jesus’ #1 job at the moment, and he, like you and me, had to prioritize constantly. It's difficult for most people because saying yes to one thing means saying no to all the others.
Saying “No” to Immediate Demands: A Leadership Lesson
So, our second lesson hiding between the lines of the story is that although Jesus deeply loves Mary, Martha, and Lazarus, he does not immediately go to them. By staying where he was, Jesus demonstrates that he has learned to say no, or not now, even to those who mean the most to him. Imagine how hurt they must've been. Imagine how difficult this must have been for Jesus to do. He knew how to stay faithful to his calling and prioritize his purpose.
“The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing,” said Stephen Covey. Easy to say; difficult to do, especially for people-pleasers in this age of immediate demands and instant expectations.
The Courage to Say No: Examples
Those who have accomplished great things know how to use the most difficult two-letter word in English - no. Steve Jobs of Apple once said he was as proud of the things Apple hasn’t done as the things they have. "Innovation," he says, "is saying no to 1000 things.” Mahatma Gandhi said, “A ‘no’ uttered from the deepest conviction is better than a ‘yes’ uttered merely to please – or worse, to avoid trouble.”
In December 1955, a seamstress boarded a bus and took her seat. As the bus filled up, the driver ordered her to give up her seat. Even though there were laws about this, she quietly but firmly said, “No." Was she too tired? She later explained, “The only tired I was, was tired of giving in.”
She was arrested and fined for violating the law, an event that caught the attention of a relatively unknown pastor who helped to organize a 381-day Bus Boycott. The boycott caused severe financial strain on the bus system and drew national and international attention. In 1956, the U.S. Supreme Court declared bus segregation unconstitutional, a landmark decision that became a cornerstone of the Civil Rights Movement.
The seamstress was Rosa Parks; the pastor was Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Her difficult “no” was a deliberate, courageous choice that inspired a movement that brought about profound societal change.
The Emotional Toll of Delaying for a Greater Purpose
Leadership expert Brendon Burchard said, "We must learn the stunning power of saying no. For most, not knowing how to say no is where their lives climb into a thicket of stress and unhappiness.”
Embracing the Power of Boundaries in Daily Life
Here’s a link where poet David Whyte discusses the power of no, or the via negativa: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/0m-rVqsFRQI
Jesus taught this lesson without saying anything but by staying “two days longer in the place where he was.”
Key Takeaways:
Returning to the foundational moments of clarity and purpose can recharge your faith when facing rejection or confusion. This practice helps to realign daily actions with long-term goals.
Mastering the art of saying "no” or “not now” is essential for maintaining focus on one’s mission, even if it means disappointing others.
Embrace life with curiosity and an open mind toward different perspectives. Viewing life’s experiences from a fresh angle can reveal profound insights and inspire creative solutions.
Taking immediate action isn’t always ideal; sometimes, pausing can provide clarity, alignment, and a greater impact when action is finally taken.
Living faithfully involves regularly reflecting on your core values and priorities. It's crucial to say "no” to distractions in order to stay focused and achieve meaningful goals.
