11.4 - I Am: Discovering the Power of Identity and Purpose
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The Endless Loop: What Identity Are You Hearing?
Have you ever had a song get stuck in an endless loop in your brain?
I mean, every time you stop actively thinking about something, it fills the void. Sometimes, I find myself awake in the middle of the night—and there it is—over and over again.
Not only that, it greets me in the morning as soon as I open my eyes. The other night, it was, “Oh Mama, I'm in fear for my life from the long arm of the law.” I don't know why. I’ve never been a fan of the band Styx, but there it was, stuck like flypaper to my prefrontal cortex.
This phenomenon prompts me to revisit the same section of John's gospel as in the last segment. Something Jesus said keeps ricocheting off the walls of my mind, creating a never-ending echo. Let's reread 11:20–27, and then I'll revisit the repeater.
20 When Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went and met him, while Mary stayed at home. 21 Martha said to Jesus, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died. 22 But even now I know that God will give you whatever you ask of him.” 23 Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.” 24 Martha said to him, “I know that he will rise again in the resurrection on the last day.” 25 Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live, 26 and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” 27 She said to him, “Yes, Lord, I believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God, the one coming into the world.”
I keep hearing, "I am the resurrection and the life." As it circles my awareness, its dance partners join in: "I am the way. I am the truth. I am the life.” Round and round it goes, "I am. I am. I am.”
What does it mean? What is that still, small, persistent voice trying to reveal to me? Then, I remembered that Jesus, through John’s perspective, demonstrates not only “what to believe” but ”how to believe.” It struck me! This is how he believed in himself. This is what Jesus affirmed to himself about himself. He embodied his identity and, in doing so, changed the world.
Faith vs. Theology: Jesus’ Lesson on Living Your Truth
While Martha was preoccupied with the theology of the moment, Jesus was frolicking in the freedom that comes from faith in your unique identity. There is a notable difference between the two. John Dominic Crossan says, “Faith is a life’s commitment; theology is a mind’s speculation.” Jesus lived out his faith in his identity.
We must recognize that this was not the outcome of an outside-in manifestation exercise. Jesus didn't simply decide he wanted to be the way, the truth, the life, and the resurrection and then repeat this over and over to make it real. No, he felt this deep within and devoted his life to it.
John the Baptist set him on a path by announcing, "the Lamb of God." Then, emerging from his baptismal waters, Jesus heard, “You are my son.” Immediately, he sought solitude in the wilderness to deepen his understanding of who he was by letting temptation whittle away those things he "was not.” He was not a magician, a trickster, or the king of this world. No, it became clear that while his body carried David's genetic code, his essence held the creator’s spiritual code. And, by faith, he allowed both to unfold into his true identity.
What does this mean for you and me? What should our children, grandchildren, and their children take away from this? Let's not just believe what Jesus believed about himself but also follow his example of how to have faith in ourselves. We should embody what is true about us, and our actions should spring from our unique identities. Easier said than done, right?
Shedding False Narratives: The Wilderness Journey to Self
How many of us take the time to explore deep within ourselves, allowing our creator to unlock that magical treasure chest known as "Unique Creative Potential” and reveal who we indeed are? Do we dare? Do we risk encountering terms like "writer," "teacher," "artist," "mystic," "healer,” “designer," or countless other possibilities? No, it's easier, safer, and more common to heed what our parents, teachers, and friends say about us and strive to become that. It's uncomfortable, downright frightening, to bring forth that unrealized possibility and subject it to trial and error in front of an unsuspecting audience. But we must!
Highlighting the significance of our identity, Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel defines sin as a "refusal of humans to become who we are.” And we all know the wages of that sin – waking up amid a midlife crisis, facing the sad fact that we don't know who we are. To make matters worse, we are not the only ones to pay for this sin. Think about the price extracted from our spouses, children, friends, neighbors, and all those who could've enjoyed the fruit of our unique gifts.
Internal vs. External: Don’t Let Livelihood Replace Life’s Purpose
I recently read a sermon by Martin Luther King Jr. entitled "The Man Who Was a Fool." In it, he said, “Each of us lives in two realms, the internal and the external. The internal is that realm of spiritual ends expressed in art, literature, morals, and religion. The external is the complex of devices, techniques, mechanisms, and instrumentalities by means of which we live. These include the house we live in, the car we drive, the clothes we wear, the economic sources we require – the material stuff we must have to exist. There is always a danger that we will permit the means by which we live to replace the ends for which we live, the internal to become lost to the external. The rich man was a fool because he permitted the ends for which he lived to become confused with the means by which he lived. The economic structure of his life absorbed his destiny. His life was submerged in the rolling waters of his livelihood.”
Harry Chapin echoed some of this idea in his song called Mr. Tanner:
“Music was his life, it was not his livelihood
And it made him feel so happy, it made him feel so good
And he sang from his heart and he sang from his soul
And he did not know how well he sang, it just made him whole.”
In the first half of the 20th century, psychologist Carl Jung said that the most important question one can ask oneself is, "What myth am I living?" This question encourages us to reflect on our stories or narratives about ourselves, which often shape our lives and perceptions without our awareness.
More recently, James Clear wrote, “The key to building lasting habits is focusing on creating a new identity first. Your current behaviors are simply a reflection of your current identity. What you do now is a mirror image of the type of person you believe that you are (either consciously or subconsciously).” (Here’s more on Identity-Based Habits.)
A 19-year-old man was severely injured in a car accident. While waiting for the paramedics and facing what could be the end of his life, he asks himself, "Did I live? Did I love? Did I matter?” This tragic event led him to believe that we all ponder these questions about our vibrancy, connection, and meaning as we approach the end of our lives. After his recovery and fueled by his curiosity, Brendan Burchard set out on a journey to discover whether his beliefs resonated with others.
He started to see himself as both an investigator and a writer. Eventually, he led a research team to conduct the largest academic study in the world on the traits of a specific group of individuals he referred to as high-performing. In Burchard's study, high performance is defined as "succeeding beyond standard norms, consistently over the long term. It requires habits that safeguard your well-being, maintain positive relationships, and ensure that you serve others as you rise.”
He published the findings in his book *High-Performance Habits: How Extraordinary People Become That Way*, which became a *Wall Street Journal* bestseller and Amazon's third-best business and leadership book of the year. By following the inner voice that whispered "writer," Burchard became wildly successful as an author and professional development coach. The book’s chapter on clarity states that high performers “consistently thought about who they wanted to be and how to become that.”
Becoming Who You Are: Embracing and Sharing Your Unique Identity
To my grandchildren and their children, we've come a long way from Jesus’ conversation with Martha. Yet, a common thread runs through each of these examples: identity represents the complete picture of who we believe we are—and who we communicate to ourselves and others that we are. Identity is also the seed of who we will become.
As Dr. King revealed, there are actually two strands to this identity: the internal or spiritual one, which encompasses our unique gifts and talents, and the external one, which represents our skills and provides the means by which we live. I'll echo his warning: "Never allow the internal to become lost in the external."
It's never too late to explore our silent depths and listen for the still, small voice that reveals our unique creative potential—the essence of who we were meant to be. It may take time and involve some trial and error, but there's no better feeling than humbly completing the statement, "I am…"
Key Points:
The Loop of Identity: Like a song stuck in your head, identity continually echoes in your mind, shaping your actions and beliefs. Jesus’ declaration, “I am the resurrection and the life,” exemplifies a deep and authentic embodiment of identity.
Faith vs. Theology: Jesus showed how believing in one’s identity leads to transformation, contrasting with Martha’s focus on theology. Faith is lived, not merely understood.
The Journey to True Identity: Discovering and embracing one's identity often requires solitude, reflection, and the shedding of false narratives, as Jesus did in the wilderness.
The Danger of External Over Internal: Dr. King’s warning about allowing external measures of success to overshadow our internal purpose is a timeless caution. Our identity should guide our work, not the other way around.
Living Authentically and Passing It On: Embracing identity requires vulnerability and action. We transform ourselves and leave a meaningful legacy for future generations.
